the honeymoon is over.

Think about something you love to do. Go ahead, think right now. I can’t wait.

Got it?

That thing, that passion and love, the thing you enjoy more than anything else. Is it always easy to do? Is it always simple and effortless? I think we all know the answer to that question is no. If it is not always easy and sometimes a struggle than why do we do it?

I was having a conversation this week with a friend of mine and we got to talking about learning new things, things we love to do and getting better at them. his example was language and mine music. When you are learning to speak a new language, it is difficult. You love the speaking in a different tongue, the communication with people you otherwise would have no way of communicating with, but it hurts. At first it is fine, you can ask for the bathroom and rattle off verbs in a sentence that make you sound like you know, but if you want to be fluent, it takes more. You have headaches after speaking like that for a whole day because your brain can not just coast at first. You are constantly in thought, constantly thinking.

I am learning to play the guitar. It is fun, easy at first. I have a few chords and with the help of a capo I can cheat to make those 4 sound different enough that I seem to be better than I am. That isn’t good enough though. I love music and I want to play more so I play and play and play. Hands cramping, fingers bleeding. It hurts and I don’t want to pick it up again, but I do. Why? Why do you speak in another language the day after you went to bed with a headache from trying so hard the previous day? When the honeymoon of something “new” is over, why push it to where it could hurt.

I would say it is because the things that are worth fighting for hurt. They can be painful. They can make your head throb and your hands bleed. However, in the end, you are glad you did.

Discipline has never been one of my strong suits. I am not one who is known for following through on commitments, I tend to let people down. It is something I live with, daily. I have failed more endeavors than I can count and I was beginning to think that was the definition of me, but something in me looks out at all the people accomplishing things. Not just things, they are living their dreams, finishing goals. Pushing past the pain and into the land of victory. Now somethings are never totally past the point of pain, there is always work to be done to push forward, but I haven’t seen that land and I am ready to step in.

I am pushing through, the honeymoon is over and I am okay with that. The fulfillment comes after the honeymoon anyway.